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Hustlin’ | For The Goal Getters

I’m starting a new series in preparation for the New Year.

Like the snowman design, it’s inspired by the scratch and sniff stickers from my childhood.

This one’s for all the goal-getters out there.

If it had a smell it would smell like…cotton candy. 

With 2018 about a month away, you might be thinking about the shit you wanna change with your life.

Maybe you want to finally quit your soul-sucking job. Maybe you want to join a gym and tone up. Maybe you’ll just get a planner and plan stuff, hoping it’ll motivate you to do it.

Maybe you’re not thinking about any of that stuff because it’s barely December.

Well…I get it.

But I hope you conquer whatever goals you have with a sense of humor, and maybe a touch of nostalgia.

You might want to keep these handy products in mind when you need a little fun motivation that’s not too fluffy and cliche.

Take a peek and bookmark this collection for later! There’s even more than what’s shown here! 

And stay tuned! I’ll be rolling out more funny & cute designs for the goal-getters out there! 

 

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It’s Too Damn Cold

I’ve pretty much finished up with my holiday designs, but I felt the need to put this one out there on a whim.

I felt like I might be honing down on a different style.

A style inspired by…the scratch and sniff stickers of my childhood. 

So I thought: what if the scratch and sniff stickers from my childhood grew up with me?

Well, they would still have that charmingly retro 80s/90s illustration style, but the sentiments would be much more applicable to adult life.

So if this one was scented, it would probably smell like marshmallows.

Or whiskey.

Or whiskey-infused marshmallows!!!!

I know it’s a bit different than what I usually do, but it’s been a lot of fun thinking up these “stickers for grown-ups”. I’m planning to release more for all the goal-getters in the New Year.

Until then, this cute design is available in my shop on a some great products:

Shop this collection for the grinch in your life! 

And if you really like this design, sharing is caring! 

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Holiday Collection 2017

I’ve got some brilliant new designs for 2017 to make your holidays happier, sassier, and trashier!

This one’s for the gal that loves Christmas a ridiculous amount, but not in a PG, super-religious way. She likes all those hallmark channel movies because they are so bad they are good. And of course, she’s got a naughty sense of humor.  Gift yourself a ringer mug, and how about an ornament for your best friend’s tree?  You can personalize it with her name!  …Shop the entire collection here…

Next, we’ve got the flip side of the Christmas-lovin’ sentiment. Because some people are a bit grinchy about the season. At least, until they get their coffee. Then it’s all good in the holiday ‘hood.  It features a pleasant retro lady insisting through saccharin sweetness that there ain’t gonna be no gahdamn joy until she gets her caffeine. I hear you, sister. …Shop this design and all it’s wondrous products here…

And finally, I’ve got a design that really speaks to the fast-moving times we live in. Tis the age of online shopping, dears. Barely a soul wants to brave the mall anymore. With the holiday season upon us, show your delivery people some love with a humorous doormat. Or, honor your love for online shopping while you cuddle a throw pillow.…Shop the collection here…

To view all these products, as well fantastic gifts for your loved ones that possess a sense of humor, check out what else is in the store! 

Have an awesome holiday season! 

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Adventure Is Out There BUT…

Although it speaks to the indoorsy types, this design was actually inspired by my running season being over. During the Spring and Summer, I would happily run 25-35 miles a week outdoors. But up until about 2 weeks ago, the pleasantly mild weather changed to dreary and f’ing cold. And I hate it.

I like being outdoors, but the prospect of being cold is enough for me to just say “Ahhh fuck it….”

I’ve lived in Wisconsin all my life, so this weather is no big shock. I know I should just bundle up and get used to it.  But that means I have to go shopping for proper attire not only for me, but also for my toddler that will inevitably be outside with me.

I don’t really like to go clothes shopping so….that seems really hard.

I think we’ll stay in instead.

We’ll just cuddle and be cozy.

This design is available in a handful of rustic, outdoorsy-inspired color palettes, so you can jump on that rustic, outdoorsy trend, but still stay genuine to your true indoorsy nature. From mugs to magnets, there’s something to playfully express your desire to just stay in

Shop the entire collection here! 

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Woolly Cooll

Man….I’m a sucker for cute fuzzy animals. And dumb jokes.

Like jokes so dumb they are funny again. Puns, yaaaassss puns.

I have a whole Pinterest board dedicated to them.

Plus, I adore llamas and alpacas. So here we go with my version of a “hipster llama”:

WOOLLY COOLL! Do you get it?!

“Woolly” because llamas are woolly, and it sounds like “really”… if you have speech issues.

Double L’s on “cool” because “llama” has two L’s!

#DADJOKEACCOMPLISHED

Well, if you want to be soooooo dorky that you are actually a trend-setter, oh man have I got the stuff for you!

This one’s available in a classic black, white & red palette:

As well as a kawaii-esque pastel palette:

Plus, there’s more where that came from! 

Check out the entire Woolly Cooll collection in my shop! 

And don’t forget to share this with anyone else who is a llama lover in your life! 

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Coffee Keeps Me Going Until It’s Time For Bed At Grandma O’Clock

I love a good adult beverage. But I’ve never actually been one for parties and clubbing and going to bars.

Too much noise, too crowded. I like a place where you can actually have a conversation with the people you’ve gone out with.

Yes, I realize, at the tender age of 31, I sound like an old person.

And something also happens when you become a parent. Uninterrupted sleep becomes something of a luxury. Even as a newborn, my son was not much of a sleeper. If he was not being held, or if he was not attached to my boob, chances are he was crying.

Things are much, much better now. Aside from his typical disinterest in napping, he sleeps through the night like a champ. But from this experience, I have learned to not take my sleep for granted. Getting a good nights rest is awesome. FOR EVERYONE. 

So do I miss the carefree weekends of my childless twenties, where I might go out to a local dive bar with a couple of friends? Yeah, sometimes I do.

BUT tucking myself in at 9:30pm in anticipation for a solid 8-hour rest reaps more benefits for me at this point in my life.

You feelin’ me?

If you can soooo relate, this design is available for you on mugs, t-shirts, posters, throw pillows and more!

Shop all the different color combos and styles! 

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Coffee Ratios

I like coffee!

I also don’t like clutter. I hate having appliances left out on the countertops. So I use a little french press that I can easily stow away in a cabinet after I’m done brewing.

French press coffee is a little bit more of a process than your average drip or Keurig coffee maker. It takes a bit longer to make, but I like the taste of it much better than any little appliance.

It also takes longer to make when a toddler insists on helping you make it.

My son is ALLLLL about helping out in the kitchen lately. Every morning he says “I wanna help make coffee wif Mama.”

I never use to have a second cup of coffee, but now it’s required drinking. Needless to say, I’m all about the half-caff coffee blend.

I really like our little process we have. While the water heats up, Ivan puts two “excavator scoops” of coffee in the french press. The boy loves construction vehicles, so the idea of being an excavator makes it even more fun!  We also add dashes of spices like cinnamon and clove for a warming, fall-time flavor. Quite often, I have a bad habit of turning my back for a split second and there ends up being a tablespoon of cinnamon with the grounds.

While the coffee steeps, we get the mug ready. This is where I usually end up with really sweet, creamy coffee.

Ivan insists on scooping the sweetener and pouring the cream. I figure the only way for him to get it right is practice, practice, practice! So I get two big scoops of sugar and a ridiculous amount of cream. Every time.

“Mmmmmm it’s good!”  I always tell him, after I take the first sip. He enjoys being a little barista-in-training.

But this whole process made me think, “there are people that like their coffee this way.” Super sweet and creamy. Before McDonalds had fancy-ish coffee drinks,  I remember being behind a woman in the drive-thru who asked to have 4 creams and 8 sugars in her coffee.  Sounds like the ratio of what’s in your average frappucino.

So this design is dedicated to all the people that like a sugar-y, creamer-laden cuppa. I think it’s great that you know exactly how you like your coffee. You ain’t no coffee snob! 

This design is available in your classic 11 oz mug format:

 

As well as a 15 oz travel mug style:

 

Shop the entire collection & drink your coffee with pride! 

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There’s A Chance This Is Ranch

I have a toddler who’s almost 3 years old.

Like many parents of young children, I often lament that my kid is a picky eater. We really have to WORK to get him to eat his fruits and vegetables.

Sometimes I think…”Damn kid, remember when you were 6 months old and sweet potatoes were just THE SHIT?” Now he won’t even eat them in french fry form.

I guess toddlers think they should get to have opinions on the stuff they put in their body. Mega eye roll.

And I suppose the worst thing you can do about a picky eater is just give up and let them eat the same 4 foods every day.

So sometimes we bribe.

“If you want a chip, you gotta eat your peas.”

But a lot of times, we give him “dippy sauce”.

Ketchup, hummus, Italian dressing, Caesar dressing — he’ll dip to his heart’s content.

But he really loves ranch dressing. Like, he would just eat it by the spoonful if he could.

Which got me thinking. He’s not alone in his ranch love.

Sure, Sriracha’s got all the attention right now, but ranch dressing will always be an American standby. A condiment classic. People eat that shit right up.

And since mugs are one of my favorite products to design for, I’m always checking out what kind of fun & trendy stuff is out there. A really popular theme I’ve seen is day drinking. There’s a lot of “This Might Be Wine“, “Day Drinking From a Mug to Keep Things Professional”  and “There’s A Chance This is Rum/Vodka/Whiskey“…basically insert whatever libation you love.

I thought it would be awesome/funny-in-a-gross-kind-of-way to do a variation on this theme. The last phrase really appealed to me because of the close-rhyme of chance and ranch.

And so this design was born. Can you just imagine a coffee mug FULL of ranch dressing?

She’s available in the classic mug styles:

And ringer mug styles:

If you or anyone you love suffers from a ranch dressing obsession, shop these mugs today! 

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I Don’t Want To Go On An Adventure

For those of us that would just rather stay in…

For those of us that cringe at the idea of camping…

For those of us that give the thumbs down to traveling abroad…

For those of us whose idea of an adventure includes a good book and a cup of tea…

I give you, I Don’t Want To Go On An Adventure

In all honesty, I am one for an adventure. So long as it’s not suddenly sprung on me, doesn’t involve interacting with lots of strangers, long periods of waiting, heights, sleeping outdoors, creepy crawly bugs, very hot weather, or very cold weather.

This design was actually inspired by my 2.5 year old son. He is a little introvert with a very good vocabulary. A few weeks back, I was trying to do some work, encouraging Daddy to get Ivan outta my hair.  

Daddy says to Ivan, “Hey Dude, let’s go on an adventure!”

Ivan says to Daddy, “I not want to go on an adventure. I want to stay hOohme.” (he pronounces “home” as though it has two syllables.)

 

So this little exchange inspired my current design. There are so many trending designs out there about the mountains calling….well what if I don’t want to answer? What about the people that are like…how about not?  So I decided to go with a parody on vintage camp shirts.

 

Mountains are great and all, but it takes a lot of planning to do mountain-y stuff. And it might be cold. And what if you get lost and have to talk to someone to get directions. I won’t judge you if you just want to stay home and play legos.  

Check out the whole collection, available in 4 different color combos in my shop!